As we age, we start to take a closer look at the life we’re currently living and evaluate our environments, choices, and relationships. By doing this, we hope to understand if we’re on the path of a truly satisfying life. With the way society is, especially in the aftermath of the pandemic, individuals are taking stock of the life they have built. They’re dreaming about the life that they would like to live. If your life feels unsatisfying and you want to make a change, no matter how big or small, know that it’s okay to start over.
What does starting over look like?
- Pursuing a job with a new company or in a new industry
- Returning to school to pursue further education or make a job change
- Ending a relationship
- Trying out a new lifestyle
- Moving to a new city, state, or country
- Building a life you love
Why might someone start over?
Someone might decide to make a change and start over in life based on any of the following:
Outgrowing your current circumstances
Your current circumstances have served you well, but there may be things about your life that aren’t working for you anymore. For example, starting over may happen when you’ve outgrown a career that you’ve loved for a long time. Or maybe you’ve outgrown a relationship or physical space. Growth as a person needs to be supported by your environment. And, if getting out of your comfort zone and your circumstances helps you to further develop yourself as a person, it may be worth starting over in some way. That way could be a new relationship, move, or career.
Seeking more fulfillment
Seeking more satisfaction and overall fulfillment in life is a perfectly reasonable reason to start over. Unfortunately, we often value comfort and stability over feeling happiness. Once we realize that we are unfulfilled, unhappy, or generally lacking in some way, it may be time to move on and start anew. It’s okay to value happiness over comfort. Enjoying your life is necessary to your motivation to work and hold stable relationships.
Just because you want to
You don’t owe anyone an explanation for why you want to start over and you can start over for any reason that you want. You might want to try something new, find something you’re passionate about, move to your favorite location, or generally seek other options for your life–all of those reasons are okay to leave the live you’re currently living and try again in a new way.
Criticism for making a change
In a society, where many of us were raised by a generation that valued false stability over happiness, there can be immense pressure to stay comfortable, to stay in jobs or circumstances with little risks, commit to something you aren’t passionate about, and stay around people that no longer serve us. It’s true that if you decide to start a new path for yourself that you may receive some criticism from those around you, but ultimately, your happiness in your path relies on you, and the supportive people in your life should be understanding of your need or want to make a change.
If you value progress as a person and in your life, moving on, starting over, and trying something new may call to you. It can be a means to keep developing your personal, professional, academic, or wellbeing goals. Whatever your reasons for wanting to start over, your decision making is valid. Criticism from others should be taken lightly. This is your life, live it in the way that works best for you.
About the author: Samantha Nolan, MA, LPC, ATR- Barnum Counseling