Spending the holidays alone? The last few years have required us to make adjustments to our holiday plans in order to stay safe and healthy. You may make the decision this year to spend the holiday season alone out of concern for safety, because of challenging family dynamics, or because you are miles away from those you care about.
No matter the reason that you may have to, or choose to, spend the holidays alone, it can be difficult, upsetting, and frustrating. However, planning for a few difficult days now can help set your expectations. You can plan some special activities for yourself, in order to enjoy your time, even if it isn’t with others.
Acknowledge your feelings about spending the holidays alone
It’s normal to have a lot of emotions that feel difficult if you’re spending the holidays alone, even if it’s by choice. Practicing acceptance in your current emotions can help you to feel better about the current dynamics in your life, as well as help you to redirect those emotions into building you up to feel happier amongst the circumstances. There is a reason for the way that you feel this year, and your circumstances can always change, meaning that there are better days ahead.
Cook yourself something special
We often associate the holidays with traditional meals that we have enjoyed in past years. Just because you’re on your own this year, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a special meal that you enjoy. If you look forward to a favorite family recipe each year, try to recreate it to keep the tradition alive. By bringing yourself into the present moment while cooking, you’ll experience the effects of grounding yourself by noticing the smells and tastes around you, connecting your current emotions with more pleasant times.
Go somewhere exciting
If you’re dreading spending the holidays alone at home, you could consider traveling to a favorite destination. Sometimes it can just feel too difficult to try to appreciate the moment we are in if we have difficult feelings or memories related to the physical place that we are in. If possible, going to a new location may help us feel happier at this time, as well as bring us peace, relaxation, and inherent memories of the time we spend away.
Make a plan for next year so you don’t have to spend the holidays alone
If you’re unhappy with the circumstances this year, then this is a good time to start thinking about a better plan for next year. Can you travel to loved ones? Should you start working on your social relationships? Can you put effort into correcting family dynamics? Take note of what is most difficult for you this year, and make a plan to work through these challenges so that you are better prepared for the holiday season next year.
Engage in a favorite hobby
If you’re spending the holidays alone, this is prime time to focus on your own needs, wants, and favorite activities. If you don’t have plans for the holidays, consider making a plan to spend the day enjoying your favorite hobbies. Some examples are watching a favorite movie, reading a new book, or working on a creative project. Bring happiness to yourself in these times with all of your favorite things.
Connect with others, even from a distance
If you’re truly feeling lonely, consider scheduling a phone or FaceTime call with those you care about. Another option: you can always connect virtually with others to share time together. If you’re seeking more in person contact, consider volunteering and helping those in your community during the cold months of the year. Helping others when we’re feeling alone can help us form connections.
If you’re struggling at this time, know that it’s okay, and the holiday season will be over soon. If you’re seeking more support, reach out to a professional who can help you navigate these challenging times.
Learn more about the author Sam Nolan, LPC, ATR-P
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