Let’s Talk about Sexuality!
I have wanted to write a blog about human sexuality for a long time so here it is! SEXUALITY. What an intriguing word with many forms of definitions and usages, especially more recently! I am so incredibly proud of the recent movements I’ve seen the past few years to raise awareness and resources available to anyone struggling with their sexuality. Actually, the past few summers I have noticed children and adolescents expressing themselves with non-binary clothing or jewelry and more importantly, I have seen adolescents in early stages of transitioning. Although, I found it exceptional to see these children and/or adolescents being comfortable with their transitions and their families standing nearby, I noticed a few strangers staring or even appearing uncomfortable.
Education on Human Sexuality is Key
First off, human sexuality is a sensitive topic in the United States. Witnessing children and adolescents becoming comfortable in their own body and sexuality may be alarming for many people. What I’ve also noticed is how uneducated people are of gender identity, labels and sexuality. SO! Let’s start with some definitions!
What is sexual orientation?
GLSEN offers sexual orientations below:
- Heterosexual (Attracted to the opposite gender)
- Bi-Sexual (Attracted to males and females)
- Homosexual (Attracted to the same gender)
- Pansexual (Attracted to all orientations)
- A-Sexual (No attraction to anyone)
- Demi-Sexual (Attracted to someone after forming a bond)
- Poly-Sexual (Attracted towards multiple people)
What is gender identity?
Gender identity is defined as male, female, transgender (transition from one gender to another) and lastly, gender nonconforming (does not identify with any gender).
Gender identity and sexual orientation are two different forms of human sexuality, BUT they both require acceptance.
But, I just don’t understand human sexuality!
I took a human sexuality course during my undergrad and one of the best speakers I witnessed was a male transitioning into a woman at 45 years old. She had already established a family with two children, career and a life for herself. She explained that she always felt like her right shoe was on her left foot and her left shoe was on her right foot. I consider myself accepting and empathetic to anyone transitioning but hearing that metaphor brought so much awareness to me. I could never imagine walking around day-by-day feeling like I was in the wrong shoe unable to bend down and fix it.
What if someone I know comes out?
It’s okay to have questions if someone you love has come out, but the important thing is to let that person know you love them. Coming out is a vulnerable and overwhelming time so providing acceptance and support will only help that person feel grounded and loved. If you are having a difficult time accepting your loved one’s gender identity or sexual orientation, the best thing you can do is educate yourself and accept their way of living. Change in sexual orientation or gender identity is not a life phase.
If you are interested in altering your gender identity or sexual orientation or even, want to come out to a loved one, contact Barnum Counseling at 630-797-9192. We are supportive and gender-affirming therapists!
Written by: Coral Pidone, MA, LPC
Image by Freepik